My Gay Life > a memoir in waiting

hello friends, LGBT and otherwise! 

 

last weekend I attended the wedding of my niece Bethan to her girlfriend of 10 years Vickey. It was an extraordinary occassion. Moving , celebratory, loving, supportive etc etc.

 

It had a profound effect on me, I made a brief speech at the wedding trying to put a perspective on how it seems like the culmination of an extraordinary journey

 

I wrote this on my facebook account:

 

" 44 yrs ago , aged 18, I left my home and family to move to London and university. I was gay which at that time was still illegal if you were under 21. Yesterday my niece Bethan got married to her girlfriend Vickey surrounded by loving families and friends who cheered them to the rafters.

For most people there it was "just" a wonderful wedding, like any other wedding.

 

But for me it was so much more than that. As I stood and watched, (in tears!), my thoughts were not only in the here and now, but also for the extraordinary journey society has taken in its acceptance of LGBT relationships.

It has been a very long and bumpy ride....... yesterday was a celebration of love, joy and acceptance. it was a wonderful, overwhelming and astonishing day! And I am still crying!"

 

I was amazed at the response, nearly 100 likes and many comments of support.

 

It got me thinking about my life as a gay teenager in the late 60's and early 70's and the extraordinary things that have changed in terms of legislation and social attitudes as I become a gay pensioner.  

 

 

1967 : sexual relations between two consenting adults in private made legal

 

1970, stonewall riots in new york

 

1983 : the scourge of Aids

 

 1986: section 28 enacted to stop the "promulagation of the gay lifestyle"

 

1990's : lowering the age of consent

 

2005 : civil partnerships allowed

 

2014: us gay folk can get married!

 

So I am going to write a memoir, and I want to hear from you.

 

some of you have known me throughout all of these years, others for only part of it,

 

So I want to chat to anyone who wants to chat to me, What was I like? , did you know I was gay before I did? How did you know, did I tell you or did you guess? what have you seen on my journey in and out of the closet door?

If you've never met me or heard of me ( more than likely!!) what has been yr experience  

 

I am going to relate my story to music, events, holidays, workplaces.

 

I am already re-remembering things, but have I remembered correctly, is your version different, are there things you know that I do not know!

 

I think my moving around from job to job, place to place has been a major part of my journey. 

 

Since I moved from Cardiff aged 18 I've lived and worked in :

 

Rochester   : greenacres boys home

 

Camberwell   greenhouse outreach project

 

Lincoln Saxon House O&A centre

 

Putney  Working boys hostel

 

Dover Woodside Boys Community Home

 

Tunbridge Wells   Meadows School

 

Croydon  Knotley Community Home

 

Walthamstow  working at Barnardos Head Office and fostering for Albert Kennedy Trust

 

Halesowen  Barnardos Midlands Regional Office

 

Dudley  8-18 Family placements

 

West Bromwich    UNISON Branch Secretary , chair of fostering panels

 

 

and now, full circle back in Cardiff.

 

as a gay man I have lived through momentous times, as my mainly heterosexual friends you have often had to live through those times with me . So what was it like? What was I like?   

 

If there are any photos, memories reflections you want to share please get in touch.,

 

Below is an extraordinary photo, me with my two sisters, my niece and her new wife ...... now who'd have thought that would ever happen 40 yrs ago!

 

 

 

 

 

  On twitter @brummytaff or email robertjohnwoods@aol.com

Let the fun begin!   

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bob Woods

robertjohnwoods@aol.com

 

@brummytaff

Why I won't be voting for Tom Watson as Deputy Leader

 I have been a member of the Labour party for 40 years and have even stood to be a Labour councillor a few times in the very Tory Royal Tunbridge Wells.

I was also Branch Secretary of largest single employer UNISON branch in Voluntary Sector for nearly ten years. So my Labour /union credentials are quite good!

But I lived in West Bromwich East for 14 years until recently and my MP was Tom Watson. Initially I was not very involved in local politics as my union work took me all over the UK. So my main knowledge about Mr Watson was what I read in the national press on long train journeys! I was impressed with his work on hackgate and against Murdoch, but I knew little of what he did for West Bromwich. At that point I did not know that there WAS little to know!

I came across his inadequacies as a result of my involvement to save The Public, a bespoke arts centre in the centre of West Bromwich. It was a controversial building, originally not very loved because of its cost & perhaps an attitude towards the arts at odds with the needs of West Brom residents.

However, it had begun to find its feet under new management and especially since the opening of New Square Shopping Precinct which it was an integral part of. Footfall was increasing hugely and usage by local residents very much increasing. Unfortunately the local Sandwell Council Labour leadership were determined to get rid of the building even ignoring a 5000 signature petition to keep it open. Philistine under estimates their paucity of imagination!

Sandwell has 70 labour councillors out of 72 and since 2010 3 labour MP’s out of four. Which leads to a dynamic where the Labour MP’s : Tom Watson, John Spellar and Adrian Bailey, leave Council business to Sandwell Leader Darren Cooper, and rarely, if ever, interfere with local politics. But at least Spellar and Bailey, mention their seats in local & social media, Watson does not even mention his constituency on his twitter profile and rarely tweets about local issues

Back in August 2012, the future of The Public was under discussion. But Tom Watson was not interested, made no attempt to intervene on behalf of his constituents. He was interviewed on local radio saying he was consulting with constituents ( of yeah!) but two hours later the closure was announced! He responded to my criticism of his lack of action by blocking me from his twitter feed. His cipher, Cllr Paul Moore, a UNITE employee and Watsons eyes and ears in West Bromwich, also blocked me from his twitter stream but also from West Bromwich East Labour feed as well. Very democratic and how they deal with contrary views

So Tom Watson may be a great MP for Wapping & Hackgate, but he is not interested in his constituents who have given him their votes for 14 years. If you don’t believe me go through his twitter time line and see how often he is in West Bromwich. In the month before this last election he visited 107 other labour constituencies. No doubt that visibility will do no harm to his votes from the deputy leadership but it showed a huge disregard for the voters who return him. 

His latest attempt at grandstanding has been pronouncements on historic child sexual exploitation involving high profile politicians. Yet the Children services in his OWN constituency has now had an inadequate rating for challenging CSE but not a word from the London media obsessed Watson. Look at his website, There is more there about his campaign to keep that well known Soho haunt The Gay Hussar restaurant open than issues far more important for his constituents .

His adoption of high profile campaigns in London is a huge contrast to his lack of any concerns that exist in the very unfashionable West Bromwich!  

 But what else is there. My friend Julian Saunders has compiled this information for your perusal    

“ Together with Roger Godsiff (Labour), Tom Watson MP had the worst voting record in Parliament from 2010 to 2015 at just 49.2%* - thus missing as much as one in every two votes – and only 29.6% of the voting population of run-down West Bromwich East re-elected Watson for another five year term!”

“Yet the "Part-Time Parliamentarian" was so confident of the traditional Labour vote turning out he hardly bothered to campaign in his own constituency at all !”

By the way the Borough of Sandwell is the 9^th most deprived in the country. It’s a great pity that Watson didn’t do more campaigning about that issue! 

But what has West Bromwich voters got from Watson: Here are a few extracts from the website "TheyWorkForYou" (or not, as the case may be...)

Voted moderately for laws to promote equality and human rights

Voted moderately for replacing Trident with a new nuclear weapons system

Voted very strongly for the Iraq war

Voted very strongly against an investigation into the Iraq war

Voted moderately for more EU integration

Voted strongly against raising the threshold at which people start to pay income tax

Has never voted on an annual tax on the value of expensive homes (popularly known as a mansion tax)

Voted moderately against measures to reduce tax avoidance

Voted very strongly for introducing foundation hospitals (another Labour NHS triumph!):

Voted strongly against fewer MPs in the House of Commons (turkey/Christmas)

Voted strongly against a transparent Parliament

Voted a mixture of for and against greater autonomy for schools

Voted a mixture of for and against academy schools

Voted moderately against local councils keeping money raised from taxes on business premises in their areas

Voted a mixture of for and against a more proportional system for electing MPs

Voted a mixture of for and against a wholly elected House of Lords

Voted a mixture of for and against transferring more powers to the Scottish Parliament (not good news for his chances in what is left of the Labour Party north of the border)

Voted strongly for a stricter asylum system

Voted very strongly for introducing ID cards

Voted moderately against a statutory register of lobbyists (perhaps no surprise here as Watson is still refusing to confirm whether the man who made cash donations to his constituency party is multi-millionaire gambler & campaigner/lobbyist Derek Webb) 

Voted moderately against limits on success fees paid to lawyers in no-win no fee cases

Voted a mixture of for and against higher taxes on alcoholic drinks (couldn't organise a p*ss-up in a brewery!)

And on the last subject we must not forget that Watson  actually voted the wrong way in a division on one of his own campaigns!



Tom Watson is not what he appears. Although high profile campaigns against Murdoch, exposing the dangers of Fixed Odds Betting Terminals and asking important questions about historic child abuse which may include politicians have given him a high public profile, his actual voting record is patchy, second worse in for Labour MP’s, and has little or no benefit for his constituents.

But the high profile campaigns to fit in with his egotistical self-aggrandisement and his aspirations for higher positions. As does his relationships and personal friendships with UNITE leadership. Tom is very much part of the union old boys network. A double edged sword at times. 

Please don’t give Tom Watson even more excuse to forget his constituents. Who knows, if he fails to become deputy leader he may be able to spend more time meeting them and working for them! On the other hand he may decide he is bored of local politics, resign and give West Bromwich East a chance to elect an MP who prioritises their needs and not their own career prospects!

Now as luck would have it, I also used to live in Walthamstow , the constituency of another Deputy Leader candidate, Stella Creasey. Old friends there report that Stella is a very unaffected person who works tirelessly for her constituents, and is not part of the union old boys network. She is young, buoyant, confident and a fresh face and attitude.

I also know Angela Eagle well as she is a patron of Justaballgame? A fine organisation campaigning against homophobia in sport.

So I am torn between these two fine women as a deputy leader and will make my decision in due course,

What is for certain I will not be voting for Tom Watson!